HIV positive

Last year UCT offered free and fast HIV-testing of staff and students and five out of the 1500 who got tested during the three-day campaign came out positive.

- What are your results?

I am a bit taken by back by the question posed by the health worker, as I thought she was the one to tell me. She is in her early forties, slightly chubby, has a "Grorud-palme" and a huge smile on her face, despite the grim news she possibly could be the messenger of.

- Negative.

She smiles again. I come to think that if I ever were HIV positive, I would like a lady like her to tell me.

- I like your confidence. Yes, it is negative.

I wasn't really worried, after eight years as a blood donor where Red Cross still wants my blood I'm sure everything is ok, at least they never called to say anything else, but for those five who had their lives changed last year by a lunch time HIV test at university, I can only start imagining the consequences.

- Those who know they are positive won't come to us, she says.

We are nearing the end of an extremely interesting course in HIV/Aids and Social Identity, and we have learned a lot about the disease, the discourses connected to it, its stigma, myths around it, facts and figures, government reports, ignorance and it has been quite an eye-opener. We had visitors from Sudan, Zambia and Norway yesterday and a very interesting presentation by Sigbjørn and Hannah. Openly and in front of 25 spectators they were discussing their experiences, ideas and knowledge about sexuality, and although slightly blushing at times they did a marvellous job enlighting some of the issues around this deadly disease.

- So how do you prevent HIV?

The lady is still smiling, but I'm not off the hook just because the test was negative, and she is now dead serious. How do I keep the status quo?

- Be faithful. And abstinence.

We've heard the ABC(D)-rule hundreds of times, still my mind goes blank. Because, well, I'm not at risk am I?

- Abstinence doesn't work these days, she says. Comdomize, that's my personal favourite!

And her grin is back. I smile too. But still feels slightly akward discussing my personal life with a stranger.

After going through many of our readings I see some patterns emerging. HIV is so deadly because it is ignored, overlooked, hushed about. One of the professors yesterday were telling Hannah off because she claimed to be in a safe position, in a stable relationship where both had been tested. No one is safe, that is ignorance. When relying on your partner you put your health in his hands. And are you sure you are willing to do that?

HIV in South Africa is a major problem. 20% of the population is expected to have it. That means when catching a full minibus taxi into town the person next to you on both sides, in front as well as the driver is most likely infected. And one can then only assume that the rest is affected.

Scandinavians are terrible. It said in one of my readings, a comparative study on youth in Kenya and Sweden, that the Swedish youth looked upon HIV as unrealistic, and not really something to worry about. I'd say that is a worry. Although the disease in Norway so far has been highest prevalent among high risk groups such as gays, prostitutes and drug users there is a rise in the heterosexual population as well, which is alarming. Because if we, in one of the most highly educated countries in the world continue neglecting the seriousness of the disease, what messages does that send to others? How can we expect a poor black woman, living in a shantytown in the Cape flats, having three children and twins on the way to take action and stand up for herself when her husband returns after working six months in the mines, a community usually saturated with prostitution, and tell him please to use a condom?

I think it's time to stop silencing this disease to death, and become a little HIV positive.